Monday, October 10, 2005


How Not to Catch a Man

In spite of what you might think, it is possible to suck in your gut and breath at the same time...It's just extremely uncomfortable. I was employing this trick tonight at Ralph's. My drug dealer doesn't drive, so I took her to the grocery store tonight as a favor. She was looking through the meat section for some lamb, and there was this incredibly handsome man in the same section. He was a big guy, which I love. He wasn't fat, or even football-player big. He was just tall with a lot of well-proportioned meat on him. He had dark, curly hair with beautiful eyes and and dark lashes. My companion asked him for some help, and so I took the opportunity to chat him up at the same time. He had a Southern drawl, and I poinced on the whole regionalism thing. It turns out he's from Louisiana. (My grandparents lived most of their lives in Baton Rouge.) We had a nice conversation, and he introduced himself and shook my hand as he left. But that, as they say, was that. He didn't offer me a phone number, and (fortunately) I didn't try to give him mine. I was looking pretty schlumpy and not exactly God's gift, anyway.

Next Step: Restraining Order

A few weeks ago I kept getting these Caller IDs from the Geffen Playhouse. I don't know who was calling me, but last time I saw actor boy, he mentioned being in a play. I got the hope in my head that maybe he'd been calling me from there during rehearsals or whatever. Tonight, in a bold and foolish move, I decided to call him and find out. He never gave me his phone number, but I stopped by Talking Book World and got it from the customer database. So I called him, and he said "No" his play isn't at the Geffen and "No" he hadn't been trying to call me. He was very friendly and pretended to be glad to hear from me, but I could tell he was in a hurry to get off the phone. I, of course, obliged and apologized for disturbing him. He said he didn't mind, but all I really hope is that he wasn't too creeped out by it.

The Boys Below

I've been hearing the gay couple downstairs fighting the past couple of days. It doesn't sound good, when gay's fight, they fight big! Hopefully things will end amicably enough, and maybe I can console the loser. (If I can't be someone's first choice, then I'm not too proud to be a rebound.)

Speaking of Which...

My turbulent friend just called me to tell me that he and his boyfriend had a violent breakup last night. Apparently, after a rather heated quarrel, my friend left to buy some cigarrettes. His erstwhile boyfriend then called the police and accused him of threatening behavior with a knife. A whole bunch of cops came and ambushed my friend at the local 7-11. They arrested him with public intoxication, and he spent last night and part of the day in jail. He's moved back in with his former roommate and is considering a two-week in-patient program. I hope he pursues it because I think some time removed from his daily life in the care of professionals would help him tremendously.

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